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Locations: Circle of Power | Psychedelic Loft | On location
Ceremonies: Psilocybin | Psiloflora | Extended Psiloflora
Employees: Arjan | Marcel | Stendert
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Beautifull and safe place
Manu and Stendert, I am grateful for my second psychedelic experience. You have given us a trusted and safe environment with your sweet care in a beautiful and appropriate environment in the forest house. Love, Danielle
Review psilocybin ceremony as therapy
Last Saturday I experienced a beautiful psychedelic journey together with Marcel. What was my path here? I have a sensitivity for depression, and in spite of this sensitivity I have been able to achieve a lot, a lot of beautiful things that I haven’t been able to enjoy because of depression. My last episode was based on a gnawing feeling, something didn’t feel right. I started to focus on meaning. But also meaning could not comfort me when my love… for life subconsciously flowed away and the depression increased in strength. I am now past the center of gravity of this episode, where therapy has helped alleviate the symptoms. What helped was the connection with my therapist, insight, and the new coping strategies I learned. But it didn’t completely get to the heart of the problem for me, namely the love of life. Where (psycho)therapy works on the level of ratio, psychedelic therapy works on the level of your soul. With this insight I started looking for something that could help me a step further, and that’s how I ended up with Marcel. I’ve been reading up on psilocybin as a medication for the treatment of depression. Marcel uses a holistic approach, through healthy food, the right supplements and sufficient exercise, the best results are achieved during the trip. And this holistic approach worked well for me, eating healthier food in combination with the supplements already gave me a more vital feeling prior to the trip. During my psychotherapy I never paid attention to this, but it is really effective. The approach of the trip was trip level 5, but in the end it became a trip level 3-4. Every body reacts differently to psilocybin and I have learned that my body needs a slightly higher dose to reach level 5. However, this did not detract from the trip, I have gained some nice insights from the process. It is literally a journey, first it slowly became more and more difficult to formulate thoughts, then it became more and more difficult to come to words and finally I came into contact with my unconscious. The genius is that your subconscious knows where your difficulties and wounds are, what needs attention and where the healing should take place. My subconscious brought me into contact with myself as a very small child, at a time when I was not yet saddled with thoughts, the feeling of having to, condemnation and punishment. As a very small me I was able to experience feelings of sorrow, relief, joy, wonder in a pure form, without words, without thoughts, without judgments. I couldn’t really remember that little me, that feels like life ago. The little me was happy and happy, outside, in nature, on the beach, in the playground, playing with his friends and sister. This little boy loved life, could also be sad, but could also be comforted, his feelings were adaptive and not stuck like in my depressions. This showed me a path that I now understand on a feeling level, a bliss in habituality, more being outside, more playing. A question I have been asking since the trip for the first time in my life: what does the tiny little me feel like? I don’t know exactly yet, but I’m going to pay a lot of attention to this in the time to come! The contact with Marcel before and after the trip was very pleasant. I also found Marcel to be very knowledgeable as a trip coach. I felt safe during the trip, I was extremely vulnerable and this was taken care of by Marcel in soft hands. This unconditional positive approach was pleasant, it gave me the space to really turn inside out. Marcel assisted me when things got difficult for me during the trip and took good care of me. I am glad that we were able to make this trip together, thank you Marcel! Read more “Review psilocybin ceremony as therapy”
Psychedelic Burnout healing
I suffered from burnout for 5 months, unfortunately I persisted during the burnout, not knowing what was going on with me and reached the final stage, couldn’t function normally and even communicate properly, had flattened emotions (depression) and had everything one can have from burnout. I went from one psychologist to another, I drank all the necessary vitamins, but didn’t see the result, read on the internet every day what I could still find, looked for something rare that would… be effective for my problem, because I had already tried everything. I never stripped, and it was a very special experience, no one could describe it with common words, and no one will understand who didn’t experience it. The start of the trip was very pleasant, because Marcel created a very nice atmosphere, with smells, colors and music, it couldn’t have been better. During the trip I got all the answers to my questions, it sounds unrealistic, but it’s true, I got full insight into my problem, at that moment I knew what exactly caused my stress, that was a deep analysis in my own, remembered my childhood times, and what is very unique, those answers I got, were stored in my subconscious, while seeing all those figures and patterns around me, I felt that my subconscious is being programmed again (restart exactly). And Marcel has felt exactly what I feel, and has directed my own thoughts to the necessary side, and I can say with all certainty that I am 80% cured, it’s highly recommended, and I want to thank you Marcel is still for everything, you did what seemed impossible to me before! Read more “Psychedelic Burnout healing”
2 x Truffle ceremony with Marcel as a depression treatment and against my anxiety
I tripped with Marcel twice in the past couple of weeks. I have been suffering from clinical depression and anxiety for the past 6 years, ever since I got bullied by some male coworkers. So, I had serious paranoia about using psychedelics as well as tripping with a strange male trip sitter in Amsterdam (as I had gotten really shocked and afraid because of my previous experiences with strange men while abroad). Marcel got in touch as soon I texted… him inquiring about trip sitting for my depression, and kept in touch with suggestions about supplements to use before tripping etc. We had tentatively figured out a date for the trip as well, and he had been super patient with my fears and concerns about doing it. Except for one thing – even though he tried to encourage me, the day before my trip, I had a major panic attack about what I was doing, cancelled my appointment and simply left town. He still didn’t get mad at me, or annoyed, or complain that I wasted a day for him or that he might have lost money etc. He followed up within a week or more to ask how I was doing. I was still contemplating what to do (as my depression has really been long running at this point) and then decided again to try it, preparing for all the things that could go wrong in my head. Anyway, this time I made an appointment with him again – and managed to keep it in spite of my panic. He ended up being a super sweet and patient guy, and tried to settle my fears. I felt totally safe and comfortable, and it ended up being a really fun trip and a great first experience. His tea was pretty good and just relaxed me ( which is pretty much what I needed ). My anxiety has dropped by over half ever since that trip, so seems like truffles definitely helps with calming you down. My depression symptoms are still around, which is why I decided to do a second trip within a week, but for whatever reason that trip didn’t go as well for me. Marcel had asked me to wait for a couple weeks himself. I also didn’t use his tea for this one – just the truffles. I had spoken to other trip sitters, who said the gap didn’t matter so much , because of which I proceeded. I have just learned that many users can have a dip in mood for a week or two after the use of psychedelics, and I have a feeling that must have been the case with me as well. So I think I should have waited until I was in a better frame of mind. My only issue was that I wish he had been a bit more aware that some people might feel a dip in mood after a trip and there are supplements that can help with that. But I think perhaps no one trips as close together, so maybe it doesn’t affect others as much. However, he respected my boundaries even while I was having not as good a trip. His emergency sugar drink helped end it sooner. He also drove me back home so I wasn’t wandering around in public transport feeling not so great. I felt totally safe during my trips and knew he could be relied upon. So, I pretty much chose to trip with Marcel because he was patient, understanding and a caring and trustworthy person – he handled the situation well even when I went off the rails a bit. That really reassured me and mattered a lot to me. Plus, I truly appreciated that he didn’t judge me for my paranoia and understood my hesitations about being around a male trip sitter after my traumatic experience. He tried to, in his own way I think, make me a bit more comfortable around strange men again and I do appreciate that. I only think that he should also focus on post-trip supplements as much as pre-trip ones ! But I would trip with him again, and definitely use his tea over just plain truffles ! Read more “2 x Truffle ceremony with Marcel as a depression treatment and against my anxiety”
My truffle experience with Marcel
My boyfriend had asked me to do a trip therapy with Marcel. And I thought this was going to be a standard colorful Saturday afternoon and in the evening I am chatting on a birthday. From the moment Marcel stepped in and conjured up his homemade hot truffle cocktail. I knew, this is not going to be a normal truffle session. I’m a fairly sensitive type and had asked for a mild dose, which I hadn’t even drunk. Because within… 12 minutes I was tripping so hard that I had to look for a dark corner. But after an hour I sank into it so deliciously that my whole house looked like a light show festival. I saw the most beautiful colors around me and my whole house started to live. A few hours later I felt a strong need to talk to Marcel. Suddenly I had a tendency to ask him my life questions and to philosophize about all the invisible frames of life. Marcel was able to guide me through these phases and we also had a lot of laughs together. I enjoyed his good preparation and the smells I suddenly couldn’t smell anymore. Because I had forgotten that we actually agreed with all of them that we gave each scent a name. After the session my brain felt so overtired that I had to sleep for an hour. Then I had to get ready again, because of course I still had a birthday where I had to go. I had experienced so much during my truffle session. That during conversations on that birthday people felt so good that I knew what they were feeling and were going to say. I also saw physical blockages in them that I didn’t see before. I had discussed this later with Marcel and according to him I had become more intuitive because of the truffle therapy. I felt relaxed and clear for a few days. And that felt really nice. I can’t guarantee that you’re going to have such a crazy experience with Marcel. But one thing I know for sure is that it will be an unforgettable event in your life. After such a session, life certainly looks different. And I can’t wait for the next session with Marcel! Read more “My truffle experience with Marcel”
A good guidance during my psychedelic journey
As a traveler with a little more experience, I can say that I recommend Marcel ! He offers a safe environment and has enough knowledge to be able to advise in many areas. With him you can grow as a human being by being inspired in several ways, when it comes to sports, nutrition or making a spiritual trip, Marcel can help you with that. I am a pleasant experience richer and strengthened in my path. Do as I say… and be enriched! Namaste . Read more “A good guidance during my psychedelic journey”
Happy life!
The help you get beforehand with trip therapy is more and more personal than I am used to. I have seen enough psychologists and this works so much better! Before the trip I already noticed that food and supplements make me feel so much better than I expected. During the trip it seemed like a bomb. It has been a couple of weeks now. I still feel less insecure because I also take good care of myself. During the trip… I saw why I made bad choices because of old pain and patterns. Life is so much better now than it was before. I can’t thank Marcel enough for this. You showed me what I needed to see. Thank you so much! Read more “Happy life!”
Truffle trip level 3-4
I had a truffle therapy at home with Marcel in December, I really liked it. I had beautiful visualizations of my surroundings, and when I closed my eyes I was in a completely different world again. The aromatherapy and perfect music made it a very nice trip and Marcel sat there quietly and asked some questions every now and then. I suffered from depressive complaints and they have become so much less, I started to exercise more, eat healthier and… more conscious, meditate and am much more active. I’m definitely going to do another truffle therapy, although I’m also curious about that other option . it’s changed my life, I can’t tell enough people. They always ask me if I have shares Read more “Truffle trip level 3-4”
Tripping and bloackages in the subconscious mind
For me, it was my first time. At first I wanted to do this for my hunting/stress problems during my work. I had also been in a ‘spiritual’ process for some time and felt that this had to happen. Anyway, the trip. It was a very intense start in which my body/mind system had to go through dark layers. Lots of nausea and feverish tunnel layers my body had to go through. All emotions/blocks in the subconscious were lived in… the now at the same time. It seemed that everything had to be enlarged so that it could process itself and disappear from the system. The next level was the sentence question on who I am. This was very confusing, shifting my consciousness from dimenties to dimenties. This was also where ‘dark’ influences came in that probably wanted to stop it. Even Marcel was used for this. Sorry Marcel maybe it’s because of my background that it went this way. Or maybe it’s because of films that got stuck in the subconscious. In the end the ikje came loose from duality and ended up in spheres as unfounded where there is no word to mention. Absolute nothing and everything at the same time if I have to give it a reference. I had the feeling that from here you can discover even deeper layers and wisdom. I noticed that only concentration and other influences threw a spanner in the works. All in all, almost a week on. Live everything in a slow motion and understand everything that happens from a wholeness consciousness with little time awareness. work went well for me as well. Live in the moment and get situations when I think of something. Tips I can give you: Make sure your intention is clear beforehand. Environment, setting is also important. Music and smells etc.. These are factors that can disrupt the trip if you are very deep. At least that was my experience. Read more “Tripping and bloackages in the subconscious mind”
Face the fears
I had a very nice trip with Marcel. I wanted to find out what a trip could do for me, after I ran into some tricky pieces in my life I couldn’t really find the answer to. My fears often stopped me from following my feelings. Since I believe that all the answers are inside, I wanted to experience that for myself. After consulting with Marcel about which trip level could help, I had a wonderful and enlightening experience. Because… my head, ego and fears dissolved, I ended up fully in my own feelings. Because of this I had many realizations and breakthroughs, even many days after the trip. My brain has really had a reset and a lot of space has been created. Because of the good guidance of Marcel I had a super experience! Thank you, it has made my life a lot lighter and I feel more relaxed and happy 🙂 Read more “Face the fears”
Psychedelic journey in the Psychedelic Loft in Schiedam
guess I’ve had a lot of experiences that others have, but it’s intense to experience it myself. In the beginning I saw beautiful statues, lots of colours and geometric figures, but at one point these statues switched to skulls and nasty little figures. I was relieved that this happened quickly and that I could indeed send it myself. I see this as fear that can be overcome. The lonely, sad little man I saw caused me a lot of grief.… I saw myself sitting down. This too went by and then immediately afterwards I experienced an intense fit of laughter with afterwards tears of happiness. An emotion I never felt before. Afterwards, a lot of amazement at what was coming at me. Hindu gods, the globe on the painting that became 3 dimensional, man woman element, yin yang. In the sad painting the colours alternated. And then on the blue painting I experienced a lot of rest. I saw fish, babies, Santa Claus, religious figures, antiquity, Greek or Romanesque text. It was a rollercoaster of impressions and emotions. What I’m getting out of it for myself: -everything will be all right -focus on the positive -you can steer by yourself -there’s more to this world than what you see. -Scared of -it’s what it is, let what needs to be done happen. -I still feel -difference between knowing and feeling -Art is important -feeling that a burden has been lifted from me, I’m experiencing peaceful rest -At the moment there are almost no thoughts, and if they do come, they’re gone immediately. (Should be the effect of meditation) I am happy to feel it and hope I can hold on to it. Maybe all clichés, but I’ve felt them I’m so glad I made this trip! Thanks, and if I want to experience this again, I know where to go. Kind regards, Ann Read more “Psychedelic journey in the Psychedelic Loft in Schiedam”
Short report about my medium dose truffle ceremony with Marcel
My name is Victor, I have chosen psilocybin therapy for several reasons. The reasons are a bit different and I would like to keep them private but I think you can imagine why you would choose this path. I’ve been reading positive things about psilocybin therapy mainly from studies done in hospitals on depressed patients who are resistant to other treatments. This was not the case for me but I knew I could get things out of it that would… help me with my “problems”. I don’t like to call it more problems after this trip but I can’t find another word to describe it. I contacted Marcel, at first it was pretty scary for me because of course it’s someone you’ve never met and then you have such an intense experience with them. That’s why I chose to bring my partner to the trip so that I would have a confidant with me and I would feel comfortable. This was also the case during the trip, I felt at ease. Everything felt very well prepared before and after the trip, I had the feeling that Marcel knew very well that I was going through and knew how to deal with it. Small things like choosing the right music and the aromatherapy that comes with it had a very big impact for me on how the experience was. I was inside myself during most of the trip, maybe it had to do with the fact that I didn’t really know Marcel or maybe I wanted to record all the information that came to me and therefore I couldn’t say much. In any case this was handled well and at no point during the trip I felt uncomfortable. And every now and then I was addressed with short questions by Marcel who then sent me during the experience and from which I learned the biggest things. I can’t say much about the experience itself, I think it’s different for everyone and difficult to describe, you can look at yourself and others in a different way and accept things better. I also had the feeling that all the emotions that were stuck during the trip found their way out without any kind of pain. Now a few days after the trip I am starting to notice more and more the positive changes that this trip has brought about, I deal with situations differently and just feel much better. Accepting things is much easier and I don’t hold on to negative emotions for as long. Even though these may seem simple changes, they have already had a big impact on these few days, I hope I can hold on to this for as long as possible and build on it. I want to thank Marcel for all this, it’s a unique experience that can be so healing in your life and which unfortunately not many people have experienced today. I hope that those who still doubt or fear this will also find their way to this form of salvation. Read more “Short report about my medium dose truffle ceremony with Marcel”
Re-born
Do you want to know what it’s like to put your old life behind you and move on as a reborn human being? This happened to me after having a special cocktail of Marcel. Really, believe it or not, but I figuratively died during my trip and woke up as a new person. From now on I leave all my insecurities behind me because I value my life so much more. People wouldn’t it be a shame if you let… your life suffer through insecurity and never reached your potential in this short life we have here? I realize this now so well wow literally wow what feels this good a new beginning, reborn. I don’t let myself be guided by what people think of me anymore and I say everything I think of something, or not… and people I tell you magical things are going to happen, you start creating your reality! Marcel knows what we need people really trust him and you’ll see. Love to you all and good luck with your journey I hope everyone will find what they need, just as I am experiencing now I grant everyone. Open your eyes and take the next step towards your own reality, love to all Read more “Re-born”
More energy and trust of intuition
I did this psychedelic journey to get more energy. And release any blockages. I have not received a direct answer, but instinctively my internal energy management has been recalibrated. And I have the impression that blockades have been released. I experienced it as very pleasant. Stendert exudes peace and confidence, which has helped me a lot during such a first ceremony.
He also clearly stated what we could and could not expect. The ceremony was part of a personal… development / coaching process and less of a spiritual affair. His personal stories and experiences have also helped me to better place the information from the ceremony. I have more energy and trust my intuition even more. And can put things into perspective better. To what extent is it difficult to indicate. I am happy with the fact that there are changes. The fact that Stendert is flexible is in space, so that the cermony could also be covered at our home was very nice for us. His presence felt very familiar and he is really working to make the process an added value for us. For me it was very good and well worth the money. So keep it up. Read more “More energy and trust of intuition”
Healing and renewing experience
A friend told me about her trip with psilocybin and I saw that in a few days she seemed in a much better place than she had been lately. Being myself in a difficult situation, and dealing constantly with anxiety and depression, I ended up researching more on the topic and was impressed to read about the actual results with psilocybin in the treatment of depression and anxiety so I decided to give it a go. I am so grateful… I did, because my outlook on life and my general feeling improved so much through it. The anxiety I always felt, like a pressure in my chest and that sort of ‘fight or flight’ mode I was constantly in are gone and I can say I wake up feeling good every day. Of course it hasn’t made my problems disappear, but honestly, the abysmal decrease of my anxiety and deep sadness have made those problems much narrower than they felt, and I feel confident I will be much better, no matter what happens next. Marcel was really great, making sure I felt comfortable and helping in asking certain questions and trying to guide me through it when I wasn’t focused enough, as well as leaving me with good questions to ask myself each day. I’d really recommend this to anyone who’s thinking about it, as it has made a huge difference for me. If I had to resume the experience into one word, it would be ‘healing’, as I really felt like this healed me from the inside out, and it was also so magical and beautiful. So really, thank you, Marcel. Read more “Healing and renewing experience”
Trip similar to the Tibetan book of the dead planned, but became differently
Here is what I can say about Marcel in his job: Prior to the trip: Very responsive, open to adapt to wishes, well organized, makes sure that everything is prepared and that no open questions remain. During the trip: Very professional and experienced, absolutely ethical behaviour, emphatic and caring, acts not as a mere tripsitter but as a coach/guide during the trip. After the trip: Still caring, not rushing out quickly to another trip, instead taking time to say goodbye,… makes sure that everything is ok with you. Checks also they day after if everything is ok, just wonderful. Here my trip experience: I’m a middle-aged women w/o any prior trip experience with mind altering substances. So here is why I wanted to do it: I studied with my Buddhist Group during the last year the first complete translation of the Bardo Thodhol (tibetan book of the death). It includes one of the most detailed and compelling descriptions of the after-death state. Just fantastic…but I thought I can only exerience what is described there during my own dying. But no, there is another book which I just found and read recently: Timothy Leary, The Psychedelic Experience: A Manual Based on the Tibetan Book of the Dead, in which he describes how to use the psychedelic mind-expansion for an after death experience according to the stages described in the Bardo Thodol. So far so good…I decided to do it with Marcel, entered the room with my meditation cushion and blanket because I assumed from Leary’s book that you do this in meditation posture. Marcel advised it would be better to the trip lying on a bed and fortunately I listend to him; I can’t imagine how one can do this in a sitting manner… Then…the trip level…of course Leary’s experience is with a level 5 trip, so I asked Marcel to prepare for a level 5 trip despite it is not recommended for unexperienced trippers. Marcel proposed to split the portion in two, so that I start with a lower level portion and if he and I think I can handle a higher level then to drink the second half of the portion within the first 30min. Actually I got a little afraid and asked him beforehand to reduce the level to 3-4, still with splitting the portion. And luckily we did it like that, because when the level 2-3 kicked in, I had a lot of nausea and if I had taken the remaining portion, I’m sure I would have had to vomit. The nausea stayed almost during the whole trip and was quite well handeld by Marcel with aromatherapy and reminding me to relax. I remember Marcel asked me as agreed questions to check my trip level, so that I could have taken the second half, but I really found it hard to articulate, words just slipped away so I just said no to everyhing he asked. The peak was quite intense and dense, I almost can’t recall it, it had something to do that I waited for the Dharmakaya clear light to appear, but it didn’t, at least not the way I had imagined/expected it would be. After realizing that I said to me: ok, not as expected, but neverthess I can enjoy it, it is all my own mind and then I relaxed even further, stopped with my wish to controll everything, even a psychedelic trip, and kind of enjoyed the colorful spirals, dragons, geometric forms., etc. Interestingly I had no emotions during the trip, it was like a peaceful, but very colorful state…I did not want to listen to any music, instead we (poor Marcel :)) listened to my “guided meditation playlist” over and over again… After the trip Marcel was so kind to leave healthy nuts and berries behind and he clearly pointed out the necessity to restore the body’s nutrition level after a trip. I had then his nuts and berries cocktail 2h after he left and it was delicious. The morning after (I did the trip in a hotel room near Amsterdam) I started crying and crying and crying without any reason. When Marcel was checking on me then the evening after I mentioned this to him and he assumed that this might have been caused by trauma release. I guess he is right, I don’t know which trauma, but my heart feels more open. Would do it and might do it again in future with Marcel! Read more “Trip similar to the Tibetan book of the dead planned, but became differently”
Stopped smoking after 20 years, 2nd session with Marcel
Hello people there I am again with a new step I took together with Marcel. A month ago I quit drinking alchohol and last Friday I had another ceremony with Marcel and this time it was all about quitting smoking, and I did it! Marcel knows how to feel me very well and says things during the trip that influence you positively and stay in your thoughts, I never thought I could stop smoking and tried to quit before we… started the ceremony (just like I did with alchohol and also worked) only smoking didn’t work out and put out my last cigarette the morning before we started. The ceremony is so incredibly powerful that I believe you can do almost anything you want, the most important thing is that you have to respect it, believe and love it, so you won’t disappoint it and get rid of your addictions. I will continue to give updates and honestly say how everything is going to go and if someone still reads and has questions you can always ask something. The trip itself was even better than the previous one, the tea marcel makes is delicious and gives incredible hallucinations and a nice feeling, he has a lot of experience and knows how to make you feel at ease. Next ceremony I’m going to plan again and see how far this can take me and other goals we can achieve together! Keep you guys updated! Read more “Stopped smoking after 20 years, 2nd session with Marcel”
A journey to my subconscious
I had just checked into my studio that I had booked through Booking when Marcel rang the doorbell. A few weeks earlier, when I had finished my last project, I had booked a truffle ceremony online and today was the day that this place was going to take place. I wanted to listen more to my subconscious and see if I could find some career advice there. After all, I had just turned 40 and decided this was a great… time to learn something about myself and my future. Marcel introduced himself and briefly explained what was about to happen. He asked how I felt and went over the answers I had filled in online in preparation for this day. I asked how ‘legal’ this was, especially for when things would go wrong. He said he had been doing this for 5 years and it was perfectly legal. In the Netherlands you are allowed to use all kinds of drugs, only you are not allowed to sell or own them all. Magic truffles can be sold, however, and this was what I was here for. Moreover, nothing had ever happened during the 5 years that he practiced this profession. That reassured me because I had to admit that I was a bit nervous after all. I asked him if I couldn’t get a higher dose because there are different levels. I wanted to silence that damn ego of mine and experience how it would feel not to be my ‘imaginary self’ anymore but my ‘real’ self. Since I had never taken truffles before, he advised against this and we went for the level below which you hallucinate and experience the world in a totally different way but still remain your imaginary self. Marcel had brought a tea with the truffles containing the active ingredient Psilocybin mixed with some herbs, vitamins and extra minerals. It tasted good. We connected his phone to the Bluetooth speaker in the room and chose which style of music I would listen to. He also said that he would be there for me during the session and that if I found him threatening I could ask him to sit down a bit further. While we were doing this I felt it coming up and he made me smell mint. I lay down on my bed. Marcel installed another lamp that generated fluorescent colors that were constantly changing. He was going to fill the room with all kinds of smells during the trip as well because they could arouse certain feelings or images. I closed my eyes and left on my inner journey. The whole session I had a very familiar feeling. I was still myself and was able to control what happened, Marcel had told me that in advance and it turned out to be true. I was in a colorful fluo 3D universe (by the lamp?) when I closed my eyes, where everything was possible. I had the feeling that I was dreaming but still awake. When I opened them or when the music stopped it felt like I was waking up again and again. I consciously kept them sometimes because I didn’t want this to ever stop. I could feel sad/anxious and happy, I could smell like never before. I saw incredible things, things that belong on a canvas, real works of art. I had the feeling that I wanted to know what life on earth meant but that I wasn’t allowed to know and certainly wasn’t allowed to take it with me to the ‘real’ world. In the beginning I was completely in it as if I was experiencing it myself. Later I watched more from a distance what was happening. It was a blissful feeling. Sometimes the music stopped for a moment and Marcel tried to ask me questions about the things I wanted to know during my trip. However, I noticed that I was having trouble getting out of my words and struggling with the earthly things. I wasn’t on earth and now I didn’t want to occupy myself with banal earthly things like a job or my future . At one point I saw my brother and mother crying and felt their grief and tried to take it away. It was as if I could take away their sad energy from a distance. It felt as if I had been here a million times, in this world I experienced with my eyes closed, as if I went there every night but now could remember it a little better. Although during my trip I was already aware that I wouldn’t be able to remember everything or even ‘had to'(?) forget everything. At one point I experienced a very blissful feeling when I said that I was going to draw all this and show it to the people in my real world. And a little later I said to myself that I wasn’t ‘allowed’ to share it anyway. I saw a kind of wolf/indian with 3 or 4 faces in one. It was hard for me to think of my wife and children, they were too earthly. I was not in the earthly world. I couldn’t think of a job either, or was drawing this unearthly world what I had to do? Discover the artist within myself and share it with the earthly world? I could use all my senses and evoke all the feelings I wanted. I felt like everything was okay, everything I did. That I could make my own laws and I didn’t have to participate in that world with all its rules that make no sense and only serve to serve others or make them rich. Time did not exist, it felt as if I had already traveled for days, but when I was early to the real time only 2.5 hours had passed and it also felt as long but in earthly terms (I know !?!?!?) I can hardly describe with words what I experienced because everything is so different than on earth, literally as the first sentence of the Tao describes it so beautifully: “The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao”. Everything I try to describe comes a long way from what I have experienced. Your brain is literally tripping too. During a trip, the Psilocybin stops your default mode network (DMN) in your brain. This part of your brain can think about the past and future, and is therefore responsible for your ego because who are you?; The person you were in the past and what you are going to do in the future, right? Because this part of your brain becomes less active, other parts of your brain communicate with each other, so you experience reality completely differently and new brain connections are made. It has been discovered on brain scans that people who have meditated all their lives can make this DMN part of the brain inactive. How wonderful it must be to be a Buddhist monk I also understand that if you have a depression, you can let go because you feel/see different things, get different perspectives and experience everything differently as a result. I also have more respect for my body, I really feel what I eat now and that it is good/healthy or not. I also wanted to get rid of my sugar addiction because Psilocybin could also cure addictions. I notice that at the moment it is easier to leave the refined sugars for what they are. I now ‘feel’ more with my whole body that it is not healthy for me. I heard Marcel cleaning up and he started talking to me. We discussed what I had been through and he told me some more things he had experienced during his trips. We said goodbye the way we had to, by a firm hug. He advised me not to go outside yet and if I did it anyway pay attention because sometimes you could concentrate too hard on one thing and wouldn’t realize the rest. I also had to let him know later that night how I was doing. Whatever I did, I had a severe headache. I think this was because I hadn’t been lying on my own pillow during the 5 hour session and had gotten a headache more often. Luckily I was allowed to take paracetamol, only these were still in my car. For my safety I decided not to take it. So I was clear and not so off the planet that I didn’t know what I was doing after the session. The hours after the session I still wasn’t ‘back to normal’. I lived a little slower, very consciously and completely in the now. When I ate fruit, I felt the saliva piling up in my mouth, I was aware of everything. The papayas, mangoes, coconut and pineapple tasted delicious, it was as if I ate them for the first time. I could look at my own hands for minutes, I saw that my hands seemed smaller than I had always thought and they were not as strong as they used to be. When I looked in the mirror I saw that I was redder and I saw veins on my forehead (due to a raised blood pressure?). I looked at my mobile phone and experienced the screen differently because the light and the letters behaved ‘differently’. Or had this always been the case and had I never really looked? I could see many more details and concentrate on something for a long time, like a child who gets something new and gets totally absorbed in it. I was more aware of what I heard and smelled. (At the moment, 2 days after the session, it’s still like this but unfortunately it’s a lot less anyway). For example, I heard a wicker rack standing in the room crackling by itself every now and then and I was very aware of the ventilation in the bathroom. I also noticed, for example, that the background behind your WhatsApp messages moves when you move your mobile phone, I had never noticed that before. I could also keep looking at the ‘online’ icon under a person’s name in WhatsApp as if that was the only thing that existed on earth. I didn’t get clear answers during my session but I feel excellent and confident. It really feels like ‘do what you really want to do without caring what others think’. I know it sounds cliché but now you also feel that because you have experienced it differently. I’m also more empathetic and can empathize better with others. I feel more. I see more. I live more in the now. I have more respect for the planet and I feel very connected to the universe. It’s as if you realize that what we humans make of it is just something tiny in this universe. The universe doesn’t need us, so you decide if you want humanity to continue to exist and if we should move to Mars because it’s too hot here. You feel that there is much more than what we are allowed to experience as humans here and that there are totally different physical(?) laws than those we know as humans. Everything is energy and you experience that during a session at first hand. You feel that time is very relative and our life is just a small thing for the universe and actually means nothing, so you have everything under control and above all you don’t have to be afraid. What can happen, only things your own brain tells you. Later, when I looked at some notes I had written down in the past about everything I still wanted to experience and what I still wanted to change about myself, I saw a lot of things that had to do with my ego. It made me laugh a lot. 6 hours after one drink I saw the world differently than before. Who or what do I want to be? I’m just who I am and I just do what I want. I don’t have to worry about what others think of me, and I certainly don’t have to put it down. I have to do things because I like them, not because I’m ‘better’ than before or than others. I do things because I feel them for myself at that moment. Finally If you live in the NOW, you are not making lists, you are doing what you feel good about at that moment. Living in the NOW is very conscious living. I consciously chose to write this down and share my adventure because friends and family around me were worried about this session. I can assure you this session was something to remember forever. I also want to thank my wife for giving me this and for letting me take a break from my family to throw myself into this adventure. There is always the fear of the unknown, but I am convinced that this unknown will give me many more instructive adventures. And that’s the best thing there is, being able to learn something new every day. “We’re all energetic (spiritual) beings who have a human experience.” May the Tao be with you! Read more “A journey to my subconscious”
Went to the other side!
Wow. What can I say? I’d been wanting to do this for sometime since listening to all the amazing research being done by modern intellectuals and institutions. Sam Harris, Tim Ferris, Jason Silva, Roland Griffiths, Michael Pollan and tons more. When I heard that it was ranked by most people as the one of the five most meaningful experiences of their lives… I knew I had to try it. Thank goodness I found Marcel! I told him I wanted the… total experience. I wanted the full entheogenic, obliteration of ego, meeting god kind of experience. He created a concoction that sent me into another dimension. 70 mg of psilocybin — and boy did it work. It’s hard to describe even now what happened in that hotel room, but I’m glad Marcel was there because when I came to he was there to make sure I found my grounding and didn’t start wandering the streets of Amsterdam on my own (Which I almost did). I’m an atheist, but grew up very religious, this was the experience I’d been craving for a while since leaving my faith. It was the transcendence without the dogma. It was the numinous without the pulpit. In fact it was even beyond that… at one point I felt that I hadn’t just met god (I’m still an atheist but it’s the best word to describe what it felt like) but I became god. I was the universe, I became Vishnu the Hindu god of creation and Brahma at the same time. It was me who would open my eyes and a thousand years would pass and a Universe would be created and I’d close my eyes and it would all disappear. (And I know very little about the Hindu religion… but that is where my brain went). Needless to say it was certainly one of the 5 most meaningful experiences of my life… perhaps even the 1st (we’ll see how I feel when I have kids or get married). In short, it was incredible. It’s now been a good 3 weeks since my session and even now I listen to the classical music that started my journey and the music is more rich somehow, more full, more heavenly. In fact I’ve fallen asleep more than once to the same classical music at the early hours of the night sending me into a renewed sense of transcendence although not as powerful. I can’t wait to do it again — I can’t wait to introduce it to my girlfriend and many other of my friends. Marcel will certainly be seeing me again next time I’m in Amsterdam. Thanks for guiding me brotha and not letting me get into too much trouble. Read more “Went to the other side!”
Knowledge
I just wanted to say that I’m so grateful that I met you, and grateful for all the knowledge you gave me, Sten!
Triptherapy… mission succeeded with coach Marcel
Triptherapy… I was careful. Did my research beforehand. Marcel also gave me the necessary information. I had faith in it and took it on. I found it quite exciting beforehand. But wow! What an experience. I have the necessary knowledge from psychology. In addition, I’ve done a lot of research into softening processes myself. But during the trip all the information comes together. But the masterly thing is that you already know the things that come out. That the answers… are already inside you. It comes out so clearly. And then you’re gonna know it but you’re also gonna feel it… That’s a really big difference. Wow! Wow! Marcel assisted me during this process. He does this very skilfully. It adapts to what I needed at that moment. He has the necessary knowledge. What made me feel confident in the situation and actually didn’t get anxious and was able to continue my process. One day later I notice revelation on revelation. The things I knew have suddenly landed. How nice! I’m really curious where this is going to take me! </